The most YOU you’ve ever been

Lauren speaking at a Rising Tide Rhode Island event. Photo by Eisley Images.

This Labor Day Weekend, I went to visit my former college roommate out of state.

This is someone I can confidently say knows me, in a lot of ways, better than I know myself. She and I lived together for all 4 years of college and supported each other through the ups and downs of navigating life from 18-22 years old. Over the years we’ve been to each other’s weddings, FaceTimed a few times during COVID lockdown, and she’s become a mom. But ultimately with life happening in different states, it’s been years since we got to sit down together in person and really thoroughly catch up.

We started talking about the difference we feel in ourselves between our 20s and our 30s. One observation of me she said that really resonated: “You are the most YOU you’ve ever been.”

It’s true.

Generally, my teens were about me trying to impress and be perfect in everything I did because I thought I had to earn people’s love.

My 20s were about discovering more of who I am but still watering myself down enough to be palatable for others.

Now, in my 30s, I give very few fucks about being palatable and have embraced much more of what feels natural to me.

Maximalism, extra-ness, vulnerability, sass, cursing, and unapologetic silly-ness.

I’ve always been pretty confident, but that came with insecurities I expressed through the judgement of others. Honestly, as a teen and early 20s, I was a snob. I can forgive myself for using that as my survival tactic.

The difference now is that my confidence today is rooted a self-compassion and appreciation that others are navigating the world as best they can. If the way someone else lives their life is uncomfortable to me, it’s more telling about what my conditioned beliefs and fears are and really has nothing to do with the other person at all.

I’m also in better tune with what my needs are - like getting some downtime during the day to recharge- and what they are NOT - like removing my body hair (because I’m not here to maintain an old sexist and racist standard for women. Seriously, fuck that.).

I’m still kind. I’m still loving. But now I extend that loving kindness to myself - something that took me a long time to learn how to do and STILL need reminders when I’m feeling low.

I truly am the most *me* I’ve ever been.

And continuing to find out what that means. I’m here for it.

🌟🌟🌟

If you are feeling less like YOU these days and want someone who can help you discover what you need to be the most YOU you’ve ever been, let’s explore coaching together.