What do you want to be when you grow up?

I did, in fact, become what I wanted to be when I grew up. Though not the way I expected.

As kids, we get asked "what do you want to be when you grow up?" implying the question "what job do you want when you are older?"

This is problematic because people uphold Toxic Professionalism by centering our identity around what we do to make money. But I digress.

As a young kid, my answer to "what to you want to be?" would change every couple years: soccer player! dentist! meteorologist!

In fact, in my early career, my jobs DID change every couple years. I moved from public service to tech start-up to corporate HR to consulting...

As an older kid, I stuck with a different answer: "I want to be an inventor."

I didn't have the language then that I have now, but my version of "inventor" was becoming an entrepreneur, a natural fit because I don't like to follow other people's bullsh*t rules (something my preschool teacher warned my parents about since there are more rules Lauren won't care for in kindergarten! 😂) and because I grew interested in developing new ways to improve the lives of others.

So in a way, my kid-self knew I'd be carving my own path. Toxic Professionalism tells people not to change paths too much or at all. But, we can also see each change as a stepping stone - gathering more data about what we want and don't want, what energizes us and what doesn't, and what environments we thrive in and those in which we don't.

I'm content thinking I'd make my younger self proud to know where I've been, where I am, and where I'm going now. Plus, she'd be pretty pumped that I'm still playing soccer now ⚽️

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For the purpose-driven career changers out there who are are still trying to answer the question "What do I want to be?" let's agree to stop asking that question of ourselves (and kids!) and instead ask "How do I want to be?" and "What do I want in my life?". We can let the answers inform our visions of ourself, the identities we adopt, and ultimately the steps we take to change our life (and career!).

You are so much more than how you make money.

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